Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Unwrapping the Kiss - Is a Kiss Just a Kiss or Is it Much More?

The final book in the Vamp City series by Pamela Palmer has finally released. OF BLOOD AND PASSION is an exciting, action-packed, thrilling, edge of the seat nail-biter but oh, has it some great kissing too. If you haven’t read this series yet…do…it’s amazing!

When I think of a kiss though, I’m reminded of one of my favorite songs…As Time Goes By, originally written for the 1931 Broadway musical EVERYBODY’S WELCOME by Herman Hupfeld, but made famous in CASABLANCA when sung by Dooley Wilson. Just as Ilsa can’t forget that song, she can’t forget the kisses she shared with Rick…but is a kiss just a kiss, or is it more?

There are so many types of kisses to be shared—sweet kisses between a parent and child, friendly kisses between friends, and those sweet, inviting, tender, yet hesitant kisses between lovers, which can turn into turbulent, fiery, passionate, and enthralling experiences of which love songs, and romance novels are written.

So when you and your lover come together as one, lips teasing, and caressing before becoming locked together, tongues entwined, and then your bodies eventually wrapping around each other in rapture…time melts away. Passion flares, and the more you kiss, the more the passion builds. 

Wow, that’s some mighty fine kissing…right? Have you ever wondered why it is we kiss?

When reading a good romance there’s nothing more inviting, scintillating, and teasing to our imaginations than a good first kiss, a breath-stealing seduction kiss, or a farewell kiss making our hearts ache with desperation.

Well, I was fascinated to learn that women and men kiss for different reasons…at least scientifically. It seems a woman kisses a man so she might collect information about him as a possible mate and a man kisses a woman…well, he does it to woo her into his bed. Why doesn’t that surprise us, ladies?

Kissing has special effects on the brain as it stimulates all the senses. A kiss allows us to see, smell, taste, hear, and of course, feel our partner.
She kisses him to collect information and he kisses her to seduce her.
Both sexes kiss to become emotionally closer. It seems our lips have a large number of neurons, which pick up even the slightest of messages. When our lips touch and take in all this amazing information, five of the twelve cranial nerves then escort these intense sensations to the brain by way of the spinal cord, brain stem, and thalamus to the somatosensory cortex
Perhaps that’s why a really hot kiss can send shivers down our spines, eh? Amazingly enough, a vast majority of this brain region is devoted to processing sensations from around the nose and mouth, which gives our lips and tongue their exquisite sensitivity.

Kissing affects more than just our senses though, it also boosts our blood pressure and increases our pulse rate. It dilates our pupils, deepens our breathing, and raises levels of oxytocin in our brains which is the chemical associated with attachment, trust, and bonding. But kissing also lowers the levels of cortisol in our bodies which reduces stress. So kissing not only brings us pleasure, enables trust, and creates attachment, but it also relaxes us. 

Sounds good to me!

Kissing can and will create an emotional bond for both sexes. But what a woman collects from kissing a man goes far beyond sight, smell, taste, and touch, she also obtains essential data about certain genes in the immune system and by using this information can decide subconsciously whether or not a man will make a good mate. Wild, huh?

Perhaps that’s the reason so many women say that a first kiss tells it all.

So what about a man? What is behind his wanting to kiss?
Well, he collects a bit of information too…it seems the scent of a woman’s breath can tell him about her fertility. Isn’t biology grand? But the main reason for him kissing a woman still lays grounded in his desire to seduce her. It seems men prefer wetter kisses because his saliva is loaded with testosterone and by transferring it to a woman, he can create a sexual craving in her. The sloppier the kiss, the more testosterone the man transmits and in turn, the more she’ll desire sex with him.

Nature sure does make it hard for us to say no, doesn’t it?

In the end though, both agree that a good kiss brings a man and woman emotionally closer together. A good, tender, passionate, sensual, and sensitive kiss can lead both to decide each might be a suitable partner, spouse, and co-parent. On the flipside, a bad first kiss can kill a possible relationship faster than poison—a very good reason not to eat garlic and onions on a first date. Like I said…it’s all about that first kiss.

Over ninety percent of people around the world kiss but even in cultures where men and women find kissing disgusting, lovers instead lick, rub, suck, nip and blow on each other’s faces prior to making love. Nearly all kinds of other creatures kiss too, or caress around the mouth. Bonobos, our closest chimp relatives, kiss with a deep tongue kiss. Dogs lick. Moles rub noses. Elephants put their trunks into one another’s mouths. Albatross tap their bills together. So throughout nature, kissing is natural but in the end, a kiss can be the start of something wonderful. So perhaps a kiss isn't just a kiss but wonderfully, so much more...

“The kiss started out tender, a caress, a promise, before slowly catching fire. Within moments, his mouth was plundering hers, and hers his, flames bursting to life all down the length of her body and deep, deep inside. Her breath grew ragged, her flesh burning as his lips trailed across her cheek, and down to the base of her neck.”
                                 –OF BLOOD AND PASSION by Pamela Palmer

See what I mean?

Happy Reading Everyone!



Elizabeth H. said...

WOW! What a topic! Very informative too! How much research did you do on it??? I'm a Pamela Palmer fan but I'm afraid I haven't read the series yet. I am SO behind on my TBR list!

Thank you for the wonderful post!

Amy Valentini said...

I'm glad you enjoyed the topic. Actually, it was mostly information from a couple of articles I read last year. The rest was easy. I just got inspired.
You're going to love the Vamp City series, Elizabeth. It's awesome!
Thanks for coming by. xox

Lover Of Romance said...

I love how much you can convey or learn in one kiss. It can be angry, sad, passionate, tender or sweet. Plus I always love that first kiss between a couple that really connects them. I can't wait to read Blood and Passion, just bought it.

UniquelyMoi said...

I've always wondered who shared the first kiss and thought caressing tongues and sharing spit was erotic. Was it instantly so, or have we been conditioned to believe it so? Great post!

Amy Valentini said...

It is amazing how much information is relayed in a kiss, isn't it, Lover of's still fun even if it the info isn't what we want. Glad you bought a copy of Pamela's new book. I hope you enjoy it. I loved it. Let me know what you think. xo

Amy Valentini said...

Hi's funny that you ask that question because the first kisses were more about sharing what the Sanskrit scriptures called 'life breath'...I guess the tongues and sharing spit evolved from that. The first record of kissing dates back as far as 3500 years ago. Kissing wasn't really part of romance until more modern times, and I mean long after medieval ages. Even in Europe...folks had bad teeth and poor oral hygiene so unless you were somewhat upper crust, there wasn't a lot of spit swapping. Some cultures still don't kiss. I figure they really don't know what they're missing.
Most experts believe it evolved from closely related 'sharing' techniques, possibly even from mothers feeding their children. There are cultures today where mothers still mouth feed their children - meaning they chew the food and feed them - mouth to mouth.
There is also evidence that men used a kiss to seal contracts in some antiquity societies, so kissing has been around a long time, just maybe not the way it is fashionable today. It's an interesting subject though.
Thanks for coming by. :-)